Saturday, July 31, 2010


It's been eighteen years now and I still miss him terribly every day. My mind is a cornucopia full of memories of those glorious days and evenings when Cliff and I were living a dream. In those times, I woke up in the morning singing, I sang while I washed the dishes, and I sang as I fell asleep at night. Our life together was music and romance. We were never rich. We lived simply. But our life together was a fairy tale.
I can still see him sitting across the little table from me on the balcony at Biddles while Oliver Jones, Charlie Biddle and Bernie Primeau sent me into raptures with the sweet standards we loved. While we relished our ribs and potato skins and listened to the music, life was everything I could ever have hoped for.
And then Oliver would invite Cliff to take over the piano and I understood what heaven was. My eyes were always on Cliff. I hardly knew there was anyone else in the room. And Cliff sang, "I saw your eyes, your wonderful eyes…" and "I've got a woman, crazy for me - she's funny that way…"
One evening at Biddles, I found myself up on that little stage singing, "Summertime." I heard my own voice and I couldn't believe it was really happening. Cliff was at the piano and I was singing to him. My childhood dreams come true.
There are hundreds of memories like these in my head and in my heart and soul. And I have written volumes of notes. I pray I will live to put them together in a book. There is just so much to tell. So much to remember. So much to share. In a world full of trouble and anger and ugliness, Cliff and I lived in an oasis of love and beautiful music. "You're Mine, All Mine - I want the world to know… " Cliff wrote - "You're Mine, All Mine, and I'll tell it wherever I go…"
"How much do I love you ? I'll tell you no lie. How deep is the ocean? How high is the sky? How many times a day do I think of you? How many roses are sprinkled with dew?"  Our life together was expressed in song - beautiful song. "Embrace me, my sweet embraceable you…"
"Someday, if all my prayers are answered, I'll hear a footstep on the stair. With eager heart, I'll hurry to the door - and maybe he'll be there."
The Sheba
Phyllis Carter